Ah, Michael Buble- will your life’s successes know no end? No, really. Can you stop being so damn good looking and talented? You’re making the rest of us look bad. Really bad. I mean, geez, the ladies swoon at the mere sound of your voice. Swoon. The rest of us pathetic shlubs work hard enough to get a smile, let alone swoon.
Christmas is the one time of year where we have a chance to make make up a little ground- find the perfect gift, earn brownie points at family gatherings… and now you’ve gone and encroached on that with your velvety, dulcet tones.
This is war, Buble… and war is hell. Our vengeance will be swift and mighty! You will fall to our might! We are Legion! We… will…
You know what?
On second thought, maybe I was a little… brash. Nothing is as bad as Mariah Carey.